So at long last we've done the deed and inseminated my wife For the 13th time in 15 months. It's been a really bizarre series of events in the lead up to it though.
I had the week from hell, starting in cancelling work for the day due to the crappy weather, then I had a car accident (not serious) and then the guy that needed to pass his test in order for me to get paid for my weeks work failed. Couple that lot with my wife getting a phone call at 10pm telling her she may need to go into the office because there's been a major screw up, all in all, a seriously shitty week!
Well on top of that my wife's ovulation was running really late (she usually ovulates between day 13 & 16) but surprisingly I ovulated which is weird because last year, I only ovulated 4 times. With ovulation being so late D2 couldn't do ovulation day so we had to go a day early.
He came round and it was really awkward because we don't really know each other. We checked his certificate and along with his driving license. Turns out, he has a really funny surname!
Anyway, we got everything into place and now it's hoping for the best, fingers crossed that in a few weeks time we'll be happily expecting.
Sunday, 27 January 2013
Tuesday, 8 January 2013
New Year, New Start!
Last time i blogged, i mentioned that we were considering changing things up a bit and seeing how things go.
Well the new year has arrived and after talking to D1 (our first donor) we have decided that we're going to try someone else. He was lovely about it, so supportive and wants to keep in touch with us which suits us perfectly because over the last year or so we have developed a friendship with him. We're both upset about it because what we had with him was the perfect set up for us but we need to know if it's him or us and this is the simplest way to know.
We started looking on Co-Parentmatch.com and Prideangel.com last week and emailed a few people. We didn't really get any replies until we emailed a guy about 30 minutes away from us. He was happy to talk to us about things and suggested that we meet up.
We met this evening in a McDonalds and he seems lovely. We asked everything we needed to ask and he answered everything really well. He is quite shy which surprised us but that's not an issue, he's more than happy to donate for siblings in the future too. He has a few donor children, one couple had identical twin girls with him which is exciting as he and my wife have twins in the family....we've always fancied twins, lol!
One thing i have found really weird tonight though is that i feel guilty and almost like i was cheating on D1, it was weird that things with D2 were awkward at first too because we're so used to jumping into a conversation with D1 about anything and everything that it was just bizarre.
All in all we're excited and hoping that it works soon :)
Well the new year has arrived and after talking to D1 (our first donor) we have decided that we're going to try someone else. He was lovely about it, so supportive and wants to keep in touch with us which suits us perfectly because over the last year or so we have developed a friendship with him. We're both upset about it because what we had with him was the perfect set up for us but we need to know if it's him or us and this is the simplest way to know.
We started looking on Co-Parentmatch.com and Prideangel.com last week and emailed a few people. We didn't really get any replies until we emailed a guy about 30 minutes away from us. He was happy to talk to us about things and suggested that we meet up.
We met this evening in a McDonalds and he seems lovely. We asked everything we needed to ask and he answered everything really well. He is quite shy which surprised us but that's not an issue, he's more than happy to donate for siblings in the future too. He has a few donor children, one couple had identical twin girls with him which is exciting as he and my wife have twins in the family....we've always fancied twins, lol!
One thing i have found really weird tonight though is that i feel guilty and almost like i was cheating on D1, it was weird that things with D2 were awkward at first too because we're so used to jumping into a conversation with D1 about anything and everything that it was just bizarre.
All in all we're excited and hoping that it works soon :)
Saturday, 24 November 2012
Update...
It's been a really long time since I did a blog, there's quite a bit I need to update you on.
A short while after I did the last blog, our friends had their little boy (one I predicted when they were just 10 weeks pregnant!) and I had the very sudden realisation that when we had the miscarriage, we lost a baby. Up until that point I kind of hadn't dealt with it at all and everything came out all at once and I broke down. I had a week of feeling so down and upset that I didn't know what to do with myself but after talking things through with my wife I felt better.
Up until that point we had both been planning a memorial tattoo for the baby and actually starting to accept what happened and deal with my grief made me want to go ahead with that. I got a star with the babies due date (12/12/12) in it and the phrase "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger" around it all in black and grey. Since getting it I have found it to be a big big help. It's given me strength going forwards and a way to remember the baby that we loved so much even though we lost him/her so early on.
We have our moments where we will have a bit of a talk and cry but we've kept open with each other and allowed each other to take whatever steps we've needed to deal with it.
We have tried since the London 2012 Olympics and not had any joy. There is a possibility that we have lost again but because we didn't do a pregnancy test and it was even earlier than the last time, we'll never know. My wife's doctor has said that if we're get concerned that it has happened again then she will order some tests to see if there's anything obvious going on.
Other than that, we're still with the same donor but we are considering changing things up in the new year as it's getting to be quite difficult again. We're just worried about changing because our donor is the perfect balance that we always said we wanted but hey, we're going away for a week in December then it's Christmas so we have some time. And who knows, we might not need a new donor!
A short while after I did the last blog, our friends had their little boy (one I predicted when they were just 10 weeks pregnant!) and I had the very sudden realisation that when we had the miscarriage, we lost a baby. Up until that point I kind of hadn't dealt with it at all and everything came out all at once and I broke down. I had a week of feeling so down and upset that I didn't know what to do with myself but after talking things through with my wife I felt better.
Up until that point we had both been planning a memorial tattoo for the baby and actually starting to accept what happened and deal with my grief made me want to go ahead with that. I got a star with the babies due date (12/12/12) in it and the phrase "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger" around it all in black and grey. Since getting it I have found it to be a big big help. It's given me strength going forwards and a way to remember the baby that we loved so much even though we lost him/her so early on.
We have our moments where we will have a bit of a talk and cry but we've kept open with each other and allowed each other to take whatever steps we've needed to deal with it.
We have tried since the London 2012 Olympics and not had any joy. There is a possibility that we have lost again but because we didn't do a pregnancy test and it was even earlier than the last time, we'll never know. My wife's doctor has said that if we're get concerned that it has happened again then she will order some tests to see if there's anything obvious going on.
Other than that, we're still with the same donor but we are considering changing things up in the new year as it's getting to be quite difficult again. We're just worried about changing because our donor is the perfect balance that we always said we wanted but hey, we're going away for a week in December then it's Christmas so we have some time. And who knows, we might not need a new donor!
Monday, 23 July 2012
Taking a Break
Month 8 came and went relatively quickly with no good news. Neither of us really believed that it would work this time, we've both been feeling so down about everything it honestly was no surprise when my wife started her period.
We've gone through every emotion possible on this journey so far and it's been exhausting. The past month we've both been getting a little bitter and almost angry with everything, it's been so so draining.
Because of this and the fact that our donor is an olympic volunteer we're having a month off to re group and focus again. We're in desperate need of it and hopefully when we start again we'll find it easier.
We've gone through every emotion possible on this journey so far and it's been exhausting. The past month we've both been getting a little bitter and almost angry with everything, it's been so so draining.
Because of this and the fact that our donor is an olympic volunteer we're having a month off to re group and focus again. We're in desperate need of it and hopefully when we start again we'll find it easier.
Saturday, 23 June 2012
What if??
Before i elaborate, you need to know that we're officially on month 8 as my wife's period came bang on time. In addition, i just want to say that we're not losing hope.
What if it takes years before it works? What if it never works? What if it does work and we end up with 15 in there?? (FTR I know that's not possible) These are the sort of questions going through my head recently.
My brother and sister in law spent 4 years trying for our youngest nephew, I think it would see me mentally exhausted a long time before that but it's a very real possibility. They aren't the only couple that have had to go through it for that long.
What if it never happens? This question scares me, I've never imagined my life without kids and being an Aunty just isn't enough anymore. If we never manage to conceive kids of our own it would be devastating to us, I just mentioned it the other night and we both started to cry, the thought of not having children physically hurts.
We've been discussing having our own children since February 2004, we'd known each other about 14 weeks and had been together 12. It's always been a joint dream, we decided on a name for a boy in 2004 and that sill remains, we love it now more than ever. Our overall plan for a long time has been to have a child each and then adopt siblings, I guess the adoption bit would be our plan if we never managed to have our own.
What if it works and we end up with 15?? Ok so maybe not 15 but what about 4, 5 or even 6?? I honestly think I'd crap my pants when we found out. Talk about overwhelming! Don't get me wrong, we'd be ecstatically happy but terrified at the same time.
I'm hoping we're not the only ones, I guess trying to make a baby makes your mind work in different ways!
What if it takes years before it works? What if it never works? What if it does work and we end up with 15 in there?? (FTR I know that's not possible) These are the sort of questions going through my head recently.
My brother and sister in law spent 4 years trying for our youngest nephew, I think it would see me mentally exhausted a long time before that but it's a very real possibility. They aren't the only couple that have had to go through it for that long.
What if it never happens? This question scares me, I've never imagined my life without kids and being an Aunty just isn't enough anymore. If we never manage to conceive kids of our own it would be devastating to us, I just mentioned it the other night and we both started to cry, the thought of not having children physically hurts.
We've been discussing having our own children since February 2004, we'd known each other about 14 weeks and had been together 12. It's always been a joint dream, we decided on a name for a boy in 2004 and that sill remains, we love it now more than ever. Our overall plan for a long time has been to have a child each and then adopt siblings, I guess the adoption bit would be our plan if we never managed to have our own.
What if it works and we end up with 15?? Ok so maybe not 15 but what about 4, 5 or even 6?? I honestly think I'd crap my pants when we found out. Talk about overwhelming! Don't get me wrong, we'd be ecstatically happy but terrified at the same time.
I'm hoping we're not the only ones, I guess trying to make a baby makes your mind work in different ways!
Friday, 8 June 2012
Pregnancy Superstitions etc...
We did another couple of inseminations over the jubilee weekend and all of a sudden our donor has gone a bit superstitious on us which is now making us a bit superstitious too.
We always reimburse our donors fuel money when he comes for a donation but this time he refused it because the one other time that his sperm did the trick since he's been donating he was meant to do 3 consecutive nights but only ended up doing 1 and therefore didn't get paid (he usually takes the money on the last night).
It got me thinking about things people say about getting pregnant or when you are pregnant, whether it be an old wives tale or from experience.
My Granny and Grandad swear there's a baby in every bottle of advocaat because the nights that Granny has had an entire bottle to herself, she woke up pregnant (desperately trying to push the thought of grandparent sex out of my mind now). I've been noticing a lot of pairs of magpies which is supposed to be good news.
Do you or does anyone you know have similar superstitions??
My wife's due on (of all days) on my birthday, I'm really hoping that her period is on a break for a few months now but only time will tell, 12 days until my birthday and 16 until we'll test. She's been having some different ovulation signs this time around though, for the first time ever she got pain during the egg release and we got the strongest OPK+ we've had in the 7 months we've been trying. Fingers firmly crossed!
We always reimburse our donors fuel money when he comes for a donation but this time he refused it because the one other time that his sperm did the trick since he's been donating he was meant to do 3 consecutive nights but only ended up doing 1 and therefore didn't get paid (he usually takes the money on the last night).
It got me thinking about things people say about getting pregnant or when you are pregnant, whether it be an old wives tale or from experience.
My Granny and Grandad swear there's a baby in every bottle of advocaat because the nights that Granny has had an entire bottle to herself, she woke up pregnant (desperately trying to push the thought of grandparent sex out of my mind now). I've been noticing a lot of pairs of magpies which is supposed to be good news.
Do you or does anyone you know have similar superstitions??
My wife's due on (of all days) on my birthday, I'm really hoping that her period is on a break for a few months now but only time will tell, 12 days until my birthday and 16 until we'll test. She's been having some different ovulation signs this time around though, for the first time ever she got pain during the egg release and we got the strongest OPK+ we've had in the 7 months we've been trying. Fingers firmly crossed!
Sunday, 3 June 2012
Teen Pregnancies...
What is it with teens these days??? Is contraception a completely foreign concept or what??
In the last month my mums friend has announced the birth of her first grandchild. Everyone was congratulating her and asking when her 20 year old son had managed it only to find out that he's a product of her 16 year old son and his girlfriend. They were both 15 when she fell pregnant!!!
As much as I know that some people make it work (I have friends that have proved that point exactly), the chances of that baby boy having a stable and strong family base is near impossible when his own parents haven't even figured out who they are yet.
Yesterday I saw my mum for the first time in months and she told me that her friends daughter has recently found out that she's pregnant, yet again, at 16! This time she is honestly one of the most immature girls I've ever met, i honestly dont think she will be ready for kids for at least another 10 years, i am honestly scared for the baby.
The only reason she even knew she was pregnant was because she was banging on weight. The doctor believes that she's less than 5 months but can't say for certain. She is engaged though, to a guy who's 19 and lives on benefits with no ambition to better himself. What sort of start is that for a child??
I think the thing that bugs me most is that these kids are making "oops" babies without a care in the world yet there are so many people out there (us included) who are doing everything they can to try and have their family but can't, I don't know if I've just reached the slightly bitter stage of trying to conceive or what. All I know is that even within my own circle there are babies being born into situations they don't deserve and that really upsets me.
In the last month my mums friend has announced the birth of her first grandchild. Everyone was congratulating her and asking when her 20 year old son had managed it only to find out that he's a product of her 16 year old son and his girlfriend. They were both 15 when she fell pregnant!!!
As much as I know that some people make it work (I have friends that have proved that point exactly), the chances of that baby boy having a stable and strong family base is near impossible when his own parents haven't even figured out who they are yet.
Yesterday I saw my mum for the first time in months and she told me that her friends daughter has recently found out that she's pregnant, yet again, at 16! This time she is honestly one of the most immature girls I've ever met, i honestly dont think she will be ready for kids for at least another 10 years, i am honestly scared for the baby.
The only reason she even knew she was pregnant was because she was banging on weight. The doctor believes that she's less than 5 months but can't say for certain. She is engaged though, to a guy who's 19 and lives on benefits with no ambition to better himself. What sort of start is that for a child??
I think the thing that bugs me most is that these kids are making "oops" babies without a care in the world yet there are so many people out there (us included) who are doing everything they can to try and have their family but can't, I don't know if I've just reached the slightly bitter stage of trying to conceive or what. All I know is that even within my own circle there are babies being born into situations they don't deserve and that really upsets me.
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