Tuesday, 12 November 2013


I realise that it's been a long time since I gave you all an update. There's no news in regards to being pregnant, sorry if I got anyone excited.

The main news is about our referral, we went to the doctors in August and she referred us and explained that we should get our appointment through within a few weeks with the date being about 4 months from there which suited us fine.

We've since been asked for the day 3 and day 21 bloods to be re done. We did those and waited for our appointment letter. A couple of weeks later we get a letter, this time it's asking for my wife to have a chlamydia test.

By the time this letter arrived it had been 2 full months and our appointment still hadn't been made. To say I was pissed off is an understatement.

I decided to get on the phone to the fertility clinic to see if there's any other tests they need us to do before they make the appointment. I spoke to a woman at nurture fertility who was really helpful and explained what the process would entail from here. Basically, we'll go for testing to make sure her tubes are clear first then it would be on to make sure egg quality and womb health is there.

This was great for me to actually get some information which I then relayed back to my wife. The worrying thing about the conversation was the realistic waiting times for the tests on the NHS.

We're still as much as 4 months away from having the initial consultation and to top that off, the wait for the first test (to check her tubes are clear) is 18 weeks. That makes a 34 week wait to find out if her tubes are clear regardless of any other tests or treatments that are required after that. All in all, we're pretty upset about it.

Since then we've been focusing on trying to make it work before the appointment, first attempt being tonight. That was until our donor text us 20 minutes before we were meant to be picking us up saying that something urgent had come up and he couldn't make it tonight, or tomorrow. That now means that we're out for another month and it stinks of the same routine we've had time and time again before a donor has quit on us.

We text him to ask if he's still in it with us or if he's changed his mind and have yet to hear anything back. We know nothing for certain but we may well be on the search for D5.


  1. Oh that really sucks. We are planning on trying to get a nhs referral in january as tried for a year and my wife has hormonal problems but even that is taking months between tests. We r not going to be able to go private for at least a year either n that will be spending our mortgage deposit! Time frames are frustrating! Where abouts in UK are you? H x

    1. We've had our referral come through today which is huge and it's for December 16th so we'll know more then. The NHS is completely wonderful and i love everything about but in this case it's very frustrating. We're in the East Midlands, we have fantastic fertility clinics surrounding us but just can't afford to use them.

  2. What IS it with Donors???? Sounds just like our old one! I don't get it! There seriously needs to be some serious consequence if this happens - it's not good enough just texting to say they can't make it.

    Sending lots of hugs. NHS is pants, but I guess we're in better positions than other countries. At least its free!

    Try to remain positive.


  3. We were SO pissed off, 20 minutes warning is a joke! the problem is that we don't actually have anyone new who is responding to our contact requests and that's making things more difficult. We're thinking of giving hime one more chance and if he lets us down after that, he'll be gone.

  4. We have just moved from London to Yorkshire and the donors up here are so thin on the ground. We r going to try commute down to london to use our old donor unless we magically find one up here. We r concerned with how many couples some will have helped if there r so few donors

  5. Our issue is exactly that. We've pretty much exhausted all of the possibilities around here, so much so that just getting a reply is damn near impossible. It sucks.